its been a while since we talked. days? months? years maybe? its weird to be this way, since we have the same blood flowing through our body. is'nt that equates to easier communication? closer bonds? i dun think this happen since i was in secondary sch.

we used to challenge each other to games, we become spoil sport when we lose; we argue and things will go back normal right? since we are family. but it is not. we are so stubborn to even say sorry to each other. perhaps this is the personality we share.

one has gone overseas to work, to be specific, in shanghai, china. he's mature, knows how to take care of himself, having a stable and healthy career with a beautiful decent girl by his side. she's working in shanghai too. how sticky they are. haha =)

the other is working too. i think he's still childish sometimes. did have a girlfriend, but due to some circumstances, they broke off. hope they get back together soon.

me, the smallest and youngest of them all. still studying. and have been slacking. i dunno why i cant get that "old self" back in sec sch days where i'm nerdy, quiet and sort of hardworking at times when exams are round the corner. i wish i still have my friends back together. where we'd joked about teachers and classmates. though i'm not that evil. haha. they were those whom stayed by my side, shared problems and mugging together effortlessly. even though there were some ups and downs among us, we still made up and bury the hatchet.

the five of us sat together in a row as if we owned that particular place. no one were sitting there 'cept for us. and i'm the only yellow guy in the clique. so its pretty cool to have non-chinese friends that are close together. so i hope we still rmb each other for years to come.

now in poly, i experienced a different type of friendship among my classmates. a friendship which has backstabbing, fake facades, gossiping, hypocrites, and lots more. perhaps these experiences will enable me to understand how dark life can be will these factors around. i chose to be not involved in this. i stayed neutral. i'm naive. i ignored those factors. i want a pure friendship without these evil factors. but the thing is, i cant. its common everywhere you roam around. in work, in families, in schools, in politics. you cant turn ur backs and pretend not to know it. you have to bring that strength from within and brush these aside.

indeed, as i moved on with life. i learned quite a number of morals and stuffs. to have a stable friendship is to have a firm foundation. Honesty, Trust & Integrity. these 3 have about the same meaning but are used differently in situations.

sounds so emotional eh? dunno why i would come out with such a topic. but, i decided to write it out to express how i feel in this moment of time.

i do hope when school reopens, it will be a brand new feeling. no more of those.

cant wait to get back to school~ its been 1 and 1/2 months rotting at home. i din went to find a job to keep myself busy, but i know i would'nt wanna work. considering how lazy i am. i wish i was working with my sec sch pal in radha export pte ltd thou. there, its been a fun and fruitful experience working there. the staffs were super duper funny and helpful, 'cept for the boss thou. cant play window's games at all. haha

well, i got my lappy reformatted thanks to jiewei. took almost like a day to get my stuffs transferred over to his comp but only 1hr to reformat. haha, wth man.

hopefully i can quit some of my bad habits and become a fresh and clean guy when sch reopens. trying hard thou. i'm addicted to smth bad to my health. needa quit it. i dunno why and how i pick this up, but an idiom says "the person who tied the knot, will be the same person to untie it." seems reasonable. well, hopefully i can untie it.

recently i've been having some arguments with my parents over my current lifestyle. sleeping thru the whole day and playing the whole night. becoming like a nocturnal creature soon. haha.

oh ya. i'm happy for my friend. just found out he got into Accountancy in SP which has a COP of 12pts. he got 11pts. whats amazing is he's from sec 5 NA. topping my ex-sec sch NA students. WELL DONE! haha. hopefully i can catch up with him soon. thou he's lazy to go out. same old pattern. from pri sch till now. haix. haha

done blogging till here le. till next time then!

i'm so addicted to Gran Turismo 3. so freaking exciting when i fly past other cars. racing games sure pumps up my adrenaline. haha.

wished there were some racing games tournaments held in sg. maybe i can be the champion. HAHA

wah cb. went jogging around my neighbourhood just now, and i can tell you its super tiring lah. given my current fitness and stamina. its been like one and a half years since i last jogged in sec sch.

almost dying out of breath when i pushed myself hard when i'm reaching my home back from the nearby park.

hope i can build up my fitness as soon as possible then

have'nt been updating lately. i guess my enthusiasm for blogging is fading away. well, since the holidays i've been lazing around at home doing nothing, must well blog to kill time.

i noticed how great my size had shrink. not eating a proper 3 meals per day. sleeping late and waking up late. i know my fitness has dropped tremendously, especially my weight. maybe i need to exercise regularly..

now my laptop is in a mess, getting hit by adwares. pretty irritating when you surf the net and something just pops out from nowhere. and its slowing down as well. needa get in done and cleaned. maybe reformatting it might help cause there's loads of rubbish in my laptop which i dun need it.

lately, something came into my mind. its been quite rare and long to think about this again. i dunno why i cant like a girl long enough to get into a relationship. back in sec4 there's a gal who had a crush on me unexpectedly. i looked like a nerd and like an ugly fella. just cant understand why she liked me. she's pretty, cute and quiet. thats the perfect personalities in a gal who i look out for. but maybe the timing she confessed to me is too difficult to handle due to my approaching O lvls. i din answer her. but i din continue to talk to her on msn and sms-ing.

after 1 month of getting to know each other better, i decided to pop the question to her. the response was quite heart-breaking, i thought that she would say yes...but she answered me the common response. "i'm not ready for a relationship." that was so heart-breaking. she even tried to be cold to me after this incident. whenever i talked to her in msn, she would give a short reply. i could still feel how it hurts whenever i talked to her. there was one night i even cried so hard that i could'nt even breathe properly. but thats how life is. getting over with it and move on with life. but she did give me an experience of how being in love and being rejected feels like.

after a year, i experienced it again. in my poly days. its was around december last yr. i confessed to a gal related to the previous one. they were best friend but after some backstabbing and etc. their relationship soured. but it was the same response. well i should'nt blog any longer.

haha. i got some pics to show back in my sec sch days. how i looked like back then.



haha. the left is me



in my poly days. changed quite alot eh?

chalet was fun. won some money from gambling. lady's luck on me eh. haha. but too little ppl went for the chalet. some din stay overnight. but well, who cares.

exam results are coming this week thick and fast. i'm not prepared for it. i know what i will get for my results. i admit that this semester i din study hard. maybe these 2 sems i din put in much effort. i dun understand why i cant concentrate and study at home. might be due to the distractions at home. well, let me cross my fingers and pray hard then.

tml have to go to NDC again. sian. like normal routine for me. and its troublesome going there.

i feel so down.